Dear Barbie,

I wanted to write you this quick note to let you know how much I love you. Even if my family hates you because I am obsessed with you and now have low self esteem and an eating disorder.
All my life I put you on a pedestool.... something to strive for. You are so beautiful and have such luxerious hair.. Who else can look so good in hot pink stretch pants?!

I tried to be just like you. I had ribs removed so my waist would be tiny and a killer boob job. I constantly wear high heals and now have foot and ankle problems, but I look good.

I focused so much on looking good that I failed out of high school. The good news is that I got my little sister to change her name to Skipper and I even found a hunky guy named Ken to date. Things are about perfect!

I also wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday!

Love,
Jill

(Yeah Right. Click here if you don't know what I am making fun of.. )